I leave town tomorrow and will be gone until after Easter, to "live in" with a community of sisters for Holy Week. So, I may not have the opportunity to blog for a while.
As I go into this week, I'm a little nervous, but also excited. I'm nervous because I just don't know what to expect--I have to trust that the Holy Spirit will guide my heart into a deeper relationship with the community. I have all those "what if" questions going through my head--and I just have to ignore them! (What if they don't like me?) None of them are rational at all, but they still nag and pull me away from the more important thoughts.
But I'm excited too. I hope this weekend is a taste of the life that I seek. I hope to keep my heart open to the present moment. I hope to learn more about the community and about myself.
I also love Holy Week and Easter--this is my favorite season. This is the reason for our faith--without the Resurrection, everything else is pretty meaningless. But it is the pain and emotion leading to Easter that is so beautiful.
Isn't it a commentary on life in general? We cannot understand the beauty of our lives if we never experience the sadness that comes with it. How much sweeter is beauty, happiness, when it comes at great cost?
Please keep me in your prayers these weeks, as I will keep you in mine.
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6 comments:
I blogged about this a few days ago basically just saying they are gaining something wonderful in you. And, they will love you, you needn't worry about that one bit (though I know how those thoughts nag).
You are always in my prayers.
And you are in mine. There's so much more I want to say..but I can't yet figure out how to put it to words. Thank you for your post--it wouldn't let me make a comment! You have an amazing way with words--an ability to express the important things of life in poetic language.
I feel blessed by you!
Have a wonderful time! Just try to be ... you'll be great.
Thanks Susan! I look forward to the week of "just being" - without worrying about work and everything else.
Wow, a live-in experience during Holy Week?! I am happy for you. That sounds wonderful. :)
I can understand the mixed emotions and conflicting thoughts - it's confusing! However, it sounds like the joy and excitement outweighs the fear and apprehension, so that has to be a good sign that you're on the right track. I wish you well with your journey. I'll be thinking of you.
May you and your community have a blessed and most holy Easter. I hope "the Easter bunny" visits you at the convent! ;)
Em -xxx-
Emma, oooooo, may the Easter bunny carry a bottomless basket of chocolates, caramel!, if he visits them! nom nom nom (and may he hop by in the morning part of that day)
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